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Watch: Manchester United 5-0 RB Leipzig | All Goals

You know what’s coming next. Fred wins the ball early and finds Pogba, who stretches forward and slides a pass in behind for Greenwood, who makes a brilliant run in between the centre-backs to meet the pass, shaking off Konate like a rag doll before easing an expert’s finish across Gulasic into the far corner. That is a suuuuuch a finish, dripping confidence, competence and composure. I’ve been watching football 38 years, give or take, and I’ve never seen a finisher like him.

Nice from United, sending Martial down the left of the box. Again, his cut-back is the right move but poorly executed, missing the men, but Konate is committed to the slide and the ball hits his arm, but no penalty is given because it’s not in an unnatural position. Following up, Greenwood murders a shot that Gulasci is forced to beat away. Nice passage of play, that.

Fred wins a challenge with Forsberg but can’t make the second with Poulsen, giving Leipzig a free-kick, and it goes short then into the box; United clear. But Leipzig maintain pressure, Poulsen challenging for a ball at the back post which drops for Konate, who heads for goal but De Gea makes a decent reflex save at his near post, turningover the top.

This is a gorgeous goal! Play to the whistle, lads. Pogba finds Fred who finds Fernandes, and without looking he sweep-scoops a lovely ball around the corner and Rashford is in! Everyone stops thinking he’s offside, but he started the run from inside his own half! He draws the keeper, opens his body and passes into the far corner.

What an impact! What a player! What a man! Fred wins a crucial challenge, poking the ball to Rashford, who see-yas Upamecano like a boss, screeches into the box, and absolutely leathers a finish past Gualsci.

Marcus Rashford! He takes the ball just outside the box and calmly snakes past four men! But he might’ve shot after the third, and the additional movement meant he screwed his shot into legs. PENALTY MANCHESTER UNITED! Lovely football again, Fred sticking Martial in! He takes too long but is still in possession when Sabitzer slides in and brings him down!

Bruno, the penalty-taker, and Rashford, on a hat-trick, allow Martial the spot-kick, as he won it and hasn’t scored this season. That’s some nice team spirit and the ball is duly smacked across Gulasci, who gets a touch, into the side-netting. This is now a brilliant performance and result.

MARCUS RASHFORD IS A SUPERHERO! Martial, who’s got better and better, burrows into the box and squares for Rashford; the ball bounces up nicely off his first touch, and he fairly lamps it home. That’s three goals in 30 minutes.

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